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You have an anxious attachment style!

Updated: May 20, 2023

You crave intimacy in romantic relationships and are capable of being emotionally close to your spouse. However, sometimes you worry that your partner doesn't want the same level of closeness as you do, and relationships can often take up a lot of your emotional energy.

As a result of your sensitive nature, you are easily upset by changes in the moods and actions of your partner. Yet, With the right level of security and reassurance from your partner, you can feel content and less preoccupied.

Establish healthier relationships as early as today:

Besides therapy, here are 3 ways in which the securely attached could establish healthier relationships as early as today:

Communicating your needs effectively

When we're anxiously attached, we might neglect our emotional needs and put all our focus on our partner. It's important to be honest about your needs with your partner and to find ways to communicate them in an effective way. Be direct about what you want from the relationship and talk about your fears and concerns. Effective communication will help your relationships improve significantly, and your partner will also appreciate your honesty and openness, which usually will lead to increased understanding and support from them.

Self-soothing activities

The ability to self-soothe is essential for anxiously attached individuals.There are many activities that can help us do so, and it often depends on the individual as to what works best. Some common self-soothing activities include reading, listening to calming music, spending time in nature, practicing yoga or meditation, and writing in a journal. Make time for these activities when stressful and overwhelming emotions surface during the day. As you practice, you will be surprised how much better you feel.

Avoid the avoidants, embrace the secure

Individuals with an avoidant attachment style may withdraw when intimacy arises. Their need for space and misunderstanding of independence will always clash with our anxious attachment need for closeness and reassurance. As opposed to anxious individuals who want their needs met by getting closer to their romantic partner, the avoidantly attached partners view intimacy as a threat. It could be a vicious cycle of codependency in a relationship.

Therefore, the anxiously attached adult who seeks intimacy with others should find someone who has a secure attachment style. Those who are securely attached do not fear intimacy, and they could help anxious to become more secure.

Want to learn more?

Here's to healthy and secure relationships 🍷

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